New year, new you. A new year is like a blank journal; the perfect opportunity to reinvent yourself and begin a fresh chapter in your life. All the mistakes of the previous 12 months shall be forgotten and buried to give rise to the new you.
And so, you create a list of all the aspirations that will make this new life chapter a wonderful adventure. And yet, after a few months, those new year’s resolutions are left unfinished or completely forgotten. To achieve all your goals and experience true change, you should set resolutions that truly resonate with your needs, and get a strong dose of motivation and willpower.
Why do we make New Year’s resolutions?
Humanity’s need for making New Year’s resolutions is nothing new. About 4000 years ago, the ancient Babylonians were the first civilization on record to hold celebrations. During mid-March, when the crops were planted, Babylonians crowned a new king or reaffirmed their loyalty to the reigning monarch. It was also a time for making promises to the gods so as not to fall out of their divine favors.
In 46 B.C., a similar tradition took place in Rome after Julius Caesar declared January 1 as the beginning of the new year. This was in honor of Janus, the two-faced god of new beginnings, doorways, and archers. Believing that Janus looked back into the previous years and ahead into the future, the Romans offered sacrifices and made promises of good behavior to the deity for the upcoming year.
A bit further in time, early Christians would spend the first day of the new year reflecting on past mistakes and thinking about how to do better in the future. Nowadays, many people, regardless of religious or spiritual backgrounds, make resolutions to themselves for self-improvement and the promise of a brighter future.
We just want to be happier
For some people, New Year’s resolutions are a matter of tradition. Others are drawn to this little ritual for the allure of starting from scratch. Most human beings have a natural tendency towards self-improvement and New Year, although an arbitrary day, provides us with a goal date to prepare our plans and get ourselves into the right mindset. According to psychiatrist Glenn E. Miller, M.D., “the fact that so many people keep making resolutions year after year, even when they do not, or cannot, always follow through on them, indicates they have hope and a certain level of belief in their ability to facilitate change, becoming more of who they truly want to be.” This urgency for change responds to our inner desire of being happier; achieving the kind of life we believe we deserve.
Why New Year’s resolutions fail
Despite our pursuit of change, the detailed to-do lists, and the personal promise that this will be the year, resolutions are usually doomed to fail. According to a survey by the Statistic Brain Research Institute, about 91% of people don’t achieve their New Year’s resolutions. No matter the intensity of our determination, keeping the same level of enthusiasm and commitment throughout the next 12 months is tough work.
A few weeks into the new year, we become entangled by life’s many responsibilities and stressors. Inevitably, we lose track or even forget about all those goals we set. This, of course, is just a summary of the real problem. Motivation scientist and author Catherine Pulsifer believes New Year’s resolutions fail because “they are only a statement, or what we wish for in the coming year. There are usually no action plans, no deadlines, no backup plans. Sometimes they are unrealistic resolutions, with no other thought or plans besides the statement.”
As the saying goes, it’s not the horse that draws the cart, it’s the oats. It’s not the gym or cardio sessions that will help you get in shape, it’s your motivation and the strength of your willpower. Good motivation and willpower will help you overcome the obstacles to achieving your goals. They will also encourage you to take all the necessary steps and build up the discipline to make a real difference in this new life chapter.
How to achieve your New Year’s resolutions
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Choose the right WHYS
When you decide you want to eat healthily to lose weight, that might not be the right way — it is an incomplete statement. Think about why losing weight is a priority; how it will be beneficial for your health, how following a balanced diet will change your life positively. This is much more important than you think. As described by sustainable behavior change scientist and author Michelle Segar, whys or motivators “are the reasons for making those resolutions in the first place.” In other words, these “are the foundation of the entire behavior change process and have a domino effect.”
Motivation, after all, is the fuel of your actions. The strength of your motivation will eventually determine whether your resolutions are achieved, abandoned, or completely forgotten. Of course, waiting for motivation to knock at your door is easier than actually allowing that motivation in. After all, boredom, resignation, lack of discipline, and self-sabotage are part of human nature and motivation’s biggest enemies.
Set manageable goals
The “go big or go home” mentality doesn’t apply here; it is one of the main reasons why New Year’s resolutions are forgotten or never completed. The best thing to do is to start small and slowly make your way up to the top so you don’t feel overwhelmed. For example, instead of giving up desserts for good, try adding more fruit to your diet and progressively shortening your candy supplies as the weeks go by. Breaking down your resolutions into reasonable steps will make the tasks less intimidating.
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Take it a week at a time
Avoid having multiple resolutions or resolutions you can’t fully commit to. While some resolutions are quite simple — like drinking three or four glasses of water per day — learning a new language, for example, demands more significant changes to your routine. You might need to enroll in a course or engage with learning resources regularly; schedule a time to practice what you learned, and assess your progress.
According to Ian Newby-Clark, Ph.D., a psychologist at the University of Guelph in Canada, people struggle with the willpower to commit to ambitious resolutions such as weight loss or language learning on top of simpler tasks. “It would take too much attention and vigilance to do all that and also decide it’s time to brush your teeth for the full two minutes and become better informed about world events,” says Newby-Clark.
So, take it a week at a time, don’t try to accomplish more than what you know you can. This doesn’t mean you should forget your resolutions, but rather, you should remember that you have 365 days to manage them. Sometimes, it’s okay to take a break from your goals and resume them once you have the time or the right mindset to go on.
Share with the world
Don’t be shy! Be open about your resolutions with your friends and family. The American Psychological Association recommends that you join a support group to reach your goals, such as a workout class at your gym or a group of coworkers quitting smoking.
Having somebody else to share your challenges and successes will make the journey much easier and less intimidating. Most importantly, you will get an extra dose of motivation to keep going whenever you feel your willpower slacking.
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